July 8th, 2026Parenting survival guide – teamwork & patience
Lisa O’Neill has three children. Two sons with her first husband, both in their early 20s, and an eight-year-old daughter to her second husband. The now single mum, 54, is originally from South Africa, and headed overseas for three years at the age of 21, and then met her first husband and immigrated to Australia in 2006. She married her second husband in 2017, now lives in Pimpama – and published her first book earlier this year. A First Time Parent is all about practical parenting, a manual perhaps, maybe a survival guide – filled with all the things Lisa discovered about parenting the first time around, and then the second. It’s now on the Amazon best-seller list. Lisa chatted with Donna Kelly.
Donna: Writing a book is a big venture. What was your why?
Lisa: I wanted to create a parenting guide that I wished for when I was raising my children. And a few years back I had a Scottish tradie come and looked in my daughter’s room, she was about six, and asked if anyone lived in it.
He said he had a two-year-old and a three-year-old and their rooms always looked like a bomb had gone off. I started giving him tips and then he asked for my number – but we realised that would not work out well with his wife, so he told me to write a book and he would be the first one to buy it. And I just started typing.
Donna: Did you have any doubts?
Lisa: I had so much self-doubt. My biggest challenge when I was writing the book was overcoming my own self-doubt and actually believing in myself. I had all this knowledge with three children aged 23, 21 and eight but I just kept questioning, will I be a good writer? Will people actually buy this book? Who am I to write a parenting book?
I knew what I wanted to say, but sometimes I just brain dumped. I had a couple of friends who read it for me and then it was edited. It was read so many times and sometimes my editor wanted to change some things, like the word poo, but I said I need to use that word. I realised that parents didn’t need perfect answers, they needed practical advice.
They wanted someone who was honest and also had been lost and helpless in the early experiences. Once I focused on that, the book just took shape.
Donna: How long did it take to write all up?
Lisa: Probably a year and a half. Once it’s written you have to read it over and over. And then play tag team with my editor, Maddie, who was lovely. It’s quite a process.
Donna: Did you find it hard to have someone else working on your passion project?
Lisa: I was afraid of that because I had two different friends read from the start to the finish and they wanted to put it in their style and their terminology. And I said no, I don’t want to use fancy words.
Donna: Do you have a single takeaway?
Lisa: I’ve been through two marriages so my big thing is teamwork. One day we were at the Sunny Coast and I saw this beautiful family. After three hours I asked if could talk to them. I told them it was so wonderful watching them two tag team with the kids, no shouting, no swearing, no harshness to their children.
I told the husband he was doing an amazing job helping the mother of his children. They said they see other young couples who have not made the changes – before they take next the big step. Sometimes husbands act like they are still single. Waiting for dinner to be served, kids put to bed, not really involved with the parenting. Teamwork is massive.
Donna: A First Time Parent seems like really practical advice – and not just for parents.
Lisa: Yes, the most important messages that I have are teamwork, communication, patience, realistic expectations. I want parents to know that they’re not alone and asking for help is okay.
And there’s also a lot in the book with dads, because dads are neglected. They also need to know they need to put in the work – give up drinking and get healthy – it takes both genetics to make that little baby.
When I got pregnant in my first marriage, we were still partying, going out, we didn’t make any changes and then baby came along and I realised I had to stop all of that. I was also one of those parents who were ‘I’m not changing my house to suit my kid, my kid will fit in with me’, and that was a rude awakening.
Donna: Do you have another book in you?
Lisa: I do. I have a lot of experience in the dental industry so the next one will be about teeth. I used to be a chairside assistant in London. I was terrified of dentists, literally they would put out a needle and I’d almost pass out.
The dentist saw that I was very empathetic with patients and put me through night school. And with that experience I would line my friends’ kids up and check out their teeth. I’ve even included a chapter about teeth in my book.
Donna: So apart from Amazon where can we find A First Time Parent?
Lisa: My landing page: https://afirsttimeparent.com/ And it’s in Gold Coast City’s libraries and I will also be at the author expo, Carnival of Words in Eagleby, on Saturday, July 11 and Sunday, July 12.
That’s Queensland’s largest indie and local author festival. And I would love to hear from any mums and bubs groups who would like me to introduce the book to them.
And from Lisa’s editor Maddie:
I was deeply impressed by Lisa O’Neill, both as a woman and a mother. What a journey she has walked, and what a gift to share it so generously with others.
A First Time Parent is not only a fantastic and comprehensive guide, but also a heartfelt companion for parents everywhere. I know without a doubt that so many mothers (and fathers, grandparents, and everybody else) will feel supported and uplifted by her words, as I was.
Honestly I learned so much while reading.
There is so much good here. Her personal stories bringing advice to life and made it relatable and full of care.
The humour and warmth in her voice create a sense of trust, like I was having a chat with a friend who’s been there. And I love how she kept returning again and again to her core themes – breathing, teamwork, love, communication. It gives her book such a steady heartbeat.
You can absolutely hear her voice, her stories, and her wisdom throughout the book. It’s ready for the world.
It has been an honour to read and be a part of her journey, and I believe this book will be a source of light and strength for so many parents.
Link: www.afirsttimeparent.com
